I was warned by biology professors not to anthropomorphize animals. I have followed this rule to great benefit–I’ve come late to the (nevertheless very important) movement that even if we use animals for our benefit, we should at the very least make sure they are treated humanely, or at least animal kingdomly.
My professors had no idea about the real dangers ahead- anthropomorphizing my PC, cell phone and laptop. Worse than that, romantopodomestisizing my devices.
I expect them to read my mind, bend to my will, be my constant companions, share in my joys and lighten my burdens and--not only never break down, crash, or passively ignore me--but correct, or at least take the blame when some mis-keying mistake causes me to end up with a computer doing exactly what it was programed to do because of my inadvertent blunders.
And because they don't, I know, at the bottom of my heart that it's due to some mischievous or malicious motive inside their high capacity memories to mess, spite or prank me. And when they do, they sit back and lol, lmao or luvbaecmt, as I pout, rave and hurl insults at them as if they were listening and as if they cared. Don’t they?
It just drives me crazy!! Why didn't I get that warning!
Don't anthropomorphize or romantopodomestisize your electronic devices!
Unless, however, it’s something that has three or less functions and its easy to power up--then, just like a me and other men--it's pretty easy to figure out, know when to recharge, teach to take out the garbage, put the toilet seat down and bring in a paycheck.
I sometimes miss the days when I was so excited to get a head lamp for Christmas. I didn't anthropomorphize it. I just put it with my back pack and there it sits waiting for me each summer, to hardly ever hear a cross word.
Loren M. Lambert © Jan. 12, 2016.
My professors had no idea about the real dangers ahead- anthropomorphizing my PC, cell phone and laptop. Worse than that, romantopodomestisizing my devices.
I expect them to read my mind, bend to my will, be my constant companions, share in my joys and lighten my burdens and--not only never break down, crash, or passively ignore me--but correct, or at least take the blame when some mis-keying mistake causes me to end up with a computer doing exactly what it was programed to do because of my inadvertent blunders.
And because they don't, I know, at the bottom of my heart that it's due to some mischievous or malicious motive inside their high capacity memories to mess, spite or prank me. And when they do, they sit back and lol, lmao or luvbaecmt, as I pout, rave and hurl insults at them as if they were listening and as if they cared. Don’t they?
It just drives me crazy!! Why didn't I get that warning!
Don't anthropomorphize or romantopodomestisize your electronic devices!
Unless, however, it’s something that has three or less functions and its easy to power up--then, just like a me and other men--it's pretty easy to figure out, know when to recharge, teach to take out the garbage, put the toilet seat down and bring in a paycheck.
I sometimes miss the days when I was so excited to get a head lamp for Christmas. I didn't anthropomorphize it. I just put it with my back pack and there it sits waiting for me each summer, to hardly ever hear a cross word.
Loren M. Lambert © Jan. 12, 2016.
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